Life throws a lot of curve balls at us, and depression can be one of them.  When the problems we have, loss of a job, loss of a loved one or a broken relationship prove to be too much..depression can set in.  The feelings of worthlessness, blaming ourselves for our problems which leave us with an overwhelming sadness and emptiness.  For some these feelings can be temporary, for others they can become a bigger problem if we let it happen.  If these feelings last more than a couple of weeks, and include the following:

• the feeling of being worthless, without any hope for the future
• having sleeping problems too much or too little.
• problems with eating - losing your appetite or eating more.
• not being able to make simple decisions or difficulty concentrating at work or school
• reduced sex drive,
• not wanting to be around other people
• you seem to have no energy, and always feeling tired
• you have thoughts of ending your life

If you have a friend who has gone through a terrible break up, or a loss in their family encourage them to seek professional help.

For those who have gone through a very bad break up, you need time to heal, to gain your confidence back.  Take it slow, gradually make your way back to meeting new people.  Realize that it is not always you who caused the relationship to fail.  Some people grow apart, but it is important for YOU to find out who you are and what YOU want in life.  Leave the baggage from your previous relationship where it belongs.  In the PAST!  Never compare your new partner with your last…that is why they are called your EX!  Figure out what the qualities that you are looking for in a man or woman.  Make it your number one priority to make that list reasonable.  I hate to say this, but who has ever gone looking for a partner and found that they had everything you were looking for?  And as time goes on, our preferences change as well.

If you are suffering from serious depression as a result of a breakup…give yourself time and talk to your doctor.  Let your friends help you, or family members.

When you are ready to start dating again, and would like to use a dating service make sure you do not use a FREE dating service.  Read my article on “Why Free Online dating can be serious to your health”

The first thing you need to do is get out! You will never meet anyone sitting at home, so get out of the house. Got a laptop? Try going to Starbucks. At Starbucks you can get 2 hours free Internet. You would not believe how many single people hang out at a Starbucks. Not only can you get a great cup of coffee you could meet someone either behind the counter or while using your laptop there. I personally use the Internet at Starbucks and can not believe all the interesting people I have met there. For instance, the President of Singles Canada sets up her virtual office there. She talks to hundreds of people a month, and most of them have a single story to tell her. They are divorced, widowed, newly single and are looking for advice on how to get back into the dating world.

Here are a few tips:

• Go to places based on your personality style - If you are a quiet person and love a great book.  Head out to your local book store.  Attend book signings, where better than to find other people who enjoy the same books as you.
• Looking for a sporty person?  Ever thought of taking a lesson…like a golf lesson.  Not only will you meet people on the golf course you will get exercise, lots of fresh air and there are a lot of wealthy people that use golf courses…hmm sound interesting?  Ski lessons, learn to fish, boating
• Are you into health or holistic solutions?  Go to weekend getaways, health expos, or even health blogs and see the kind of people who visit those sites.
• Laundromats?  Yes I am serious, you would not believe the discussions that have happened while doing laundry.
• Parties - never refuse the opportunity to go to a party.  Birthdays for friends, art openings, special-event parties.
• Are you a single parent?  It is hard to get out without your children, so why not go to events for children.  There are a lot of other single parents..single Moms and single Dads that attend them too.  Kids can actually create conversations with other parents and you never know which one will be single and looking to get back in the dating scene again
• Sporting events…HUGE!!  From softball, hockey, soccer.  Join a baseball team, even if you are not good..lot’s of people join them to be part of something.
• Walk your DOG, or borrow a friends dog.  Dogs are great ice breakers, you would be surprised the number of people who will stop and talk to you when you have a dog

Whatever you do, wherever you go..try to engage with people.  Start a conversation

Suffering from a broken heart is anything but fun. This is something that many people have had to deal with at least once, and some more than that. If you are suffering from a broken heart it is safe to say that you will know it. There are many symptoms of a broken heart, and all of them can greatly affect your life and the way that you live.

The most common symptom of a broken heart is depression. In other words, you will not feel like doing much due to your heart being broken by somebody you love. This is a psychological symptom of a broken heart, and one that can cause many additional issues. For instance, depression can lead to not eating, not associating with others, and at the extreme side of things thoughts of suicide. It is important to realize that while depression following a broken heart is normal, thinking about suicide is not.

Believe it or not, there are many physical symptoms of a broken heart as well. Some of them can include a stomachache, nervous stomach, fatigue, nausea, frequent crying, headaches, and muscle tension.

Every symptom of a broken heart is difficult to address. If you are dealing with a broken heart it is important to remember that time is the best medicine. There is not much you can do for a broken heart other than wait it out. Over time you will begin to feel better, and will hopefully realize that you can get on with your life and find a new love.

There are many psychological and physical symptoms of a broken heart. If you have ever had your heart broken you know that these symptoms can be difficult to deal with. While some symptoms are normal, others can lead to major issues and damaging thoughts. All in all, giving your broken heart time to heal is the number one remedy.

Feeling down in the dumps after a breakup is natural. But you need to know the difference between feeling down and knowing when something is terribly wrong. The fact of the matter is that you may need professional help. This may sound like a bad thing, but it can actually work in your favor. As you can imagine, professional help can help you beat your problem and hopefully get your life back on track sooner rather than later.

Here are a few tell-tale signs that you need to seek professional help:

1. You have been depressed and keeping to yourself for weeks on end.
   There is nothing wrong with feeling down, but if you are not leaving home and don’t want to see anybody you may need to seek professional assistance.
2. You are not eating as much as you should.
   This is a sign that you need professional help. Your body needs food to survive even if you are depressed. If you continue to avoid food you are going to cause more problems for yourself, both psychologically and physically.
3. Contemplating suicide is beyond serious, and is something that needs to be dealt with by a professional.
   If suicidal thoughts are creeping into your mind make an appointment with a professional without delay.

Again, it is natural to feel bad for yourself after a breakup. This is never fun, but you should realize that it is a process that you will go through. It is important that you know the difference between what is natural and when you need to seek professional help. If you feel that your situation is getting worse and that you are heading for disaster, speaking with a professional is the way to go. This way you will have somebody to talk to, as well as a qualified professional who can give advice on how to fix the problem at hand.